Today is a sad day for me. I am missing Pop. Last Wed was his birthday (as my loyal blog followers know). I went to the cemetery on Sunday. The grass is growing over part of his headstone... I didn't have grass clippers with me to trim it :( Plus, I didn't have $$ to buy him balloons, which I normally leave on his grave for his birthday.
And, added to that sadness, I am missing Lilly. What would have been her birthday is coming up soon. Sniff. And Halloween next week... I wonder what she would have been? I wonder if she would be scared of the other costumes? I wonder what her favorite candy would be? I wonder if she would actually go to the doors and say, "Trick or treat!"? I wonder if she would need speech like her big brother did?
*sigh* I hate wondering. I am just pissed off that I don't have my darling daughter in my arms. I have never been able to tuck her in, or read her a story, or give her a bath, or take her to the park, or do ANYTHING with her.
DAMN!
Jo
1 comment:
I totally relate. As you know, my EDD was on October 30 or 31st (one doctor said 30th the other said 31st) so it is a tough time for me too. Well, we will just wallow in self-pity together, eh? ((HUG))
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