1. If you hide the candy wrapper inside the toilet paper tube, Mom and Dad won't find it.
2. If you hide the candy wrappers under the tent in your room, Mom and dad won't find them.
3. If you pour red bath gel all over your body to try to trick your mom and dad into thinking you are bleeding, you shouldn't step out of the tub onto the linoleum to admire yourself in the mirror.
4. Your mom and dad won't think bath gel is really blood.
5. When you try to lean against a wall to look "cool", you should be sure that you are actually NEAR the wall so you don't fall flat on your face.
6. When you trick or treat at the dorms on campus you get a LOT of candy... and I mean a LOT! "Enough to last 365 days!"
7. Howling in the bathoom at the restaurant really isn't a good idea... and could get you kicked out of the restaurant.
8. You don't get very far when you run away from home and you're not allowed to cross the street by yourself (plus, it gets dark so much earlier now!)
9. Riding your bike full speed into the tire of your dad's truck is NOT a good idea... and is QUITE painful.
10. God is his hero :)
1 comment:
And if you're second grader is a girl you get to learn:
1. Eye shadow as blush is not that attractive
2. If you walk away from an uncooperative friend she will eventually come around to your way of thinking.
3. Fancy dresses are the best dresses, even if it's the wrong season.
4. The prettiest shoes are the best shoes, even if it's gym day.
5. Yes "it" is worth crying about. Grown women have forgotten what it's like to be little women. It's all worth crying about.
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