Thursday, July 31, 2008

Things I am thankful for.

I know.. it sounds like it should be a November post... right around Turkey Day. But I firmly believe that we should find something to be thankful for each and every day --- even the bad days.

I also apologize in advance for the length of the post.

Yesterday I was wandering through some of the little shops downtown searching for something for Greta. Something to send to let her know I understand her pain (she's my niece who just lost the baby). I didn't know what I wanted exactly. I knew I wanted a little trinket that would be easy to mail and not too expensive.

After searching several stores (and being ignored completely in one -- I hate that!) I walked into a store called Basketree. I didn't figure they would have anything because they sell mostly baskets (who knew? LOL). Anyway, the woman asked if she could help me find anything and I said, "I am looking for a little charm or trinket to send to someone who just lost a baby." Her eyes got teary and she said, "Oh, that is such a sad thing." She showed me the perfect little tokens. They are about the size of quarters and are silver and have little sayings on one side and pictures on the other. I got Greta one that has a little angel engraved on one side and on the other side it says, "There is an angel watching over you." Awww!!! I loved it! I sent the token along with the book I just finished (About What Was Lost). I hope they help her in her healing journey.

Anyway... while I was shopping for that perfect something I saw a plaque with a quote from Mother Theresa that I love and I want to find a piece of wood and paint this for my new and improved patio area :) It said, "Life isn't about avoiding the storms, it is about learning to dance in the rain." How true.

I pondered the verse all day long and thought about all of the storms I have been through in my life and all of the people who held umbrellas for me and taught me to dance in the rain. This post is for them.

I am, and always will be grateful that I have Blake. I was told I couldn't get pregnant so he was a breathtaking surprise for us. My pregnancy with him had many storms, and we were very worried (even before knowing the pain of losing a child) that we were never going to get to meet him. I praise God every day for letting me have Blake. I kiss him goodnight EVERY night and I kiss him good morning too :)

Words cannot express the gratitude I feel for the following people. I try to pay it back, but sometimes I feel like I fall short.

To Shelley. For being there through EVERY storm in my life. For not judging me. For loving me enough to be completely honest with me. For loving my son. For accepting my husband.

To Tammy. For showing me a different way to look at life. For showing me that even the most horrendous situation, can be a teaching moment. For your strength. For accepting me just the way I am.

To Mike. For loving me for me. For putting up with my spoiled, rotten ways. For spoiling me rotten. For holding me up when my legs could not. For tenderly holding my broken heart. For being a good Daddy. For being a good husband.

To Joy. I always think of you when I see the little signs that say "Sisters by birth, friends by choice". Thank you for listening when I need to talk. For not judging. For telling me it is OK to grieve the loss of my child, even if other people may not think she is real. For giving me space.

To Terri. Thank you for being a part of my life. I hope that one day we will meet in real life. For accepting Lilly as a real person. For allowing me to cry and to be sad and for not telling me that I need counseling because I am grieving what I will never have. For understanding.

To Stacey. For your honesty. Even when we don't agree. For being so open to ideas. For understanding. For remembering Lilly's angel month. For the wonderful chats that we have that make me laugh out loud in the eye of a life storm.

To Theresa. Even though we don't see each other as much as we would both like. For keeping in touch. For remembering.

To Tonia Jo. For changing your mind about me way back in Barnes Hall. For giving of yourself so unselfishly. For loving me.

Oh my gosh.. this could go on for ages :) A hubangous, heartfelt, wonderful thank you to all of the following for being a part of my life:
My mom
My mother in law
Shannon C.
my brothers

I am also thankful for Angie, author of the blog "Bring the Rain". Her words touch my soul.

Thank you everyone for being umbrellas in my life storms. Next time, let's dance in the rain together :)


Stacey said...

What a sweet post. You're pretty much awesome too. *hugs*

Ter said...

aw, I've never been described as an umbrella before...


Tonia said...

Alright, let's set this straight once and for all: I didn't NEED to change my mind about you. Once I met you I liked you right off and things were swell from there. I was only skeptical of the you on paper and I don't think that should count because I didn't act on my skepticism at all!

Jo said...

Hey T... no worries! I still think it's funny that you didn't think you'd like me but then when we met we were instant friends :)

You are an awesome person and you were the best roommate EVER!